The Looking Window ~ Christmas 2017

The big bay window in our house was placed there by my father and my uncle Joe a few years ago when I was small, like four. It replaced a small, tired, broken one, and the day the new one was installed he called it the looking window.

"Why Daddy?"

"Because when you look through it you will see the face of either friend or foe, it will show you who is good and who is not."

I froze on the spot, there's no way that I'm going to look through that window. My internal fears went away when my mum put some very heavy curtains over it. It was only then I would be brave enough to go into our living room.

Daddy had told me if someone knocks on our door, I was to go to the looking window to see whether he or she was naughty or nice and if they were naughty I had to run as fast as I could to tell him or mummy. Of course if they were nice, I had his permission to open the front door.

I knew he was having a go at me, and inside I thought he shouldn't scare little kids like that, it wasn't until I told my school mates the following day that they also said they had a looking window. For a six-year-old I reckon I was pretty smart, everybody told me that I was. I didn't believe most of the stories the other kids were telling me and that night I had some pretty awful nightmares. My mummy had to get into bed with me until I dropped off to sleep again.

I asked mum again several times the next morning what it was all about. I needed to be reassured I think, she said,

"Come with me Teddy." She took my hand and walked me into the living room. I was scared but she assured me there was nothing to be scared of. She pulled back the drapes and made me look into the window. I saw nothing, only a large green lawn with fruit trees scattered across it.

"Now Ted, when someone comes to the door and rings the bell, come to the looking window and look in this right hand window pane. You will be able to see who's at the door without them seeing you. If you know them then let them in, if you don't you come and get me or daddy. Promise me?"

"Yes mummy, I promise." I still didn't like the looking window much, it confused me.

Our doorbell would ring and I would look at mum.

"Go on, have a look through the looking window first baby."

I did what I was told and more and more the looking window became less scary. I would call mum if it was a stranger or I would run to open it for my cousins or nana. A neighbour or two who I knew, but always if it was a stranger I would call mum.

Easter was upon us and I was getting excited because I knew I would be getting some pretty awesome Easter eggs; one day I was sitting doing my numbers when the doorbell rang.

"Go to the looking window first Teddy." I jumped off the kitchen chair and ran into the living room. I peeled the curtains back a little and looked over to our porch. Standing there was a big bunny rabbit and he had a basket of Easter eggs in his hand. I let go of the drapes and ran to answer the door.

"It's okay mummy, it's the Easter bunny." I threw open the door and this six-foot rabbit bent down and patted my head.

"Oh it's you Easter bunny, come in for some carrots." He took my hand and followed mum into the kitchen, leaving Easter eggs wherever he could find a safe spot for them. He didn't talk, he just had a big toothy grin on his face and by the time he finished his carrot, I was sitting on his knees with chocolate plastered all over my face.

"He left his basket mummy." I pulled on her cardigan sleeve.

"He's got plenty to go around Teddy, these ones are just for you."

"Do you think daddy would want one mum?"

"Of course he would when he gets home son, I will have one too if you don't mind sharing."

"I don't mind mummy, have all you want, I've got plenty." She hugged me then gave me a wipe down. The doorbell went again and I did the same as before, this time it was daddy.

"Daddy, guess what? A big Easter bunny was here and he left some eggs for us all, he was really, really big daddy, but he doesn't talk much and you missed him."

"Did I son, well maybe next year or early tomorrow morning I might see him hopping around the garden."

He kissed my mummy and likes to do that a lot, then he kissed my head.

The next day the doorbell rang and I did my job and looked through the looking window. It was my two cousins and my aunty Bell so I let them in and told them all about the Easter bunny. They gave me some more chocolate eggs and I gave them some of mine in return.

A clown turned up for my birthday and I didn't know whether to let him in or not, but my mum said he looked friendly. I was having a party and he handed me a present and did some magic tricks for us kids.  Then when he looked exhausted, he sat and had coffee with my mummy and her friends. An hour later my daddy turned up with a big present for me, he kissed my mum and me then we both went to play with the other kids.

At Christmas I was looking forward to seeing Santa and I knew he would appear in my looking window. So every night I would look through it for any signs of his imminent arrival.

The doorbell went later one night so I jumped off mum's knee and went to my looking window.

"Daddy," I screamed then went to unlock the door. Mummy was behind me and when I opened it there was no one there, but I had seen my daddy standing in front of the door.

"He's not coming home for Christmas Teddy, he's been delayed in Sydney on business and can't get a flight or bus home."

"But I saw him mummy, I saw him through my looking window."

"Maybe you saw something son, but it wasn't your daddy." She cried softly then I had to go to bed. I had a nightmare and it scared me, my daddy won't be here for Christmas and it made me so sad. I crawled into bed with mummy and she hugged me.

"We will have fun Teddy, next year he will be home with us,"

I helped mummy put the small tree up and we did a good job too. She was constantly on the phone and I could see tears in her eyes. The snow had started falling and our fruit trees looked like they had a big white blanket on them.

The doorbell went again so I looked through my looking window.

"Daddy." I jumped off the little stool and ran for the door, but again there was no one there.

On Christmas eve mummy and I were sitting in the kitchen and I was helping her wrap some small presents for my cousins when the doorbell went again. I thought this time it really will be him.

"It's daddy mummy, he's back from his working."

I opened the door and there stood my daddy with a big present for me, my mummy smiled then ran into his arms. He kissed her and hugged me.

"I thought you were here last night and the night before daddy, I looked through the looking window and saw you.

"Teddy I missed the bus and couldn't get a flight so I hired a car to come home. I was only thinking about you and mummy waiting for me to have Christmas with you both."

"But I saw you,"

"You couldn't have son, I was in another state last night and the night before."

I looked into his blue eyes confused and he started talking and hugging my mummy who was still crying, then the doorbell went again.

I ran full speed into the living room, hopped on my little stool and peeled the curtains back from my looking window.

"It's Santa mummy, daddy it's Santa." I waved at him and he gave me a robust,

"Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas Teddy." I ran to the door and mummy and daddy were behind me, there was no one there but he had left a present on my doorstep. I took both their hands and said,

"Merry Christmas mum and dad."

Then we heard a loud jingling of bells

"Ho Ho Ho, off Dancer, Off Vixen, lead on Rudolph, Merry Christmas everyone."

No.... did you really expect me to kill off daddy? No way, it's Christmas for God's sake.