Believe Again

Author's Note:

The title for this story is taken from Delta Goodrem's newest album, "Delta". It is a wonderful song, and I recommend that you all try and get the album, as Delta is a fine Aussie songstress.

The night was hot, and humid. Jack was forced to wear just his boxers to bed, and he was close to pulling those off himself. He tossed and turned, sleep not coming easy for him.

Every time he began to drift, azure eyes filled with love filled his vision. Azure eyes that he would no longer have the joy of seeing every day.

He still blamed himself for the 'incident', as everyone referred to it. It was, after all, his idea to go on the ride. In the aftermath, he had refused to eat, couldn't sleep and remained silent, even to the day we now join him.

Nothing anyone said or did could pull him from his self exile from life. It took two weeks before he would eat anything proper, he was still unable to sleep without the nightmares plaguing him and he remained mute.

His mum, he knew, was devastated over the state he was in, but he just couldn't find it in him at the moment to do anything about it. His dad, who knew of the situation before the incident, was a little less worried. He knew that in time, Jack would pull through.

The most troubling part of it all was the fact that it was Christmas Eve, and while Jack had started eating again, he was still looking a lot worse for wear. It was the top of his parents' wish lists that their happy, carefree boy would return to them, but each day nearer to Christmas, that looked less possible.

Just as Jack began to drift off again, he was jolted by a glassy tap, coming from his window. Looking to the object in question, he saw a face he had no name for, but had seen a few times at school. This face had grey eyes, which looked almost luminescent silver in the low light given by the half moon. It also sported a full head of fine blond hair. This face was one that Jack had taken notice of, but had never had the courage to put a name to.

Jack slowly extracted himself from his bed, completely forgetting his lack of clothing in his confusion at the reason behind the sudden appearance of this person at his house. He made his way to the window, opening it to allow the person entry into his private sanctuary. As the person hefted themselves into his room, Jack moved back, and allowed himself a moment to visually inspect the new presence. It was in private thought that he said to himself that the specimen before him was almost divine. Lightly muscled, lightly tanned and the same height as Jack, the face he had seen at the window most definitely suited the

body now presented to him.

"Jack Kandon?" the person asked, using a voice that again perfectly matched the face that spoke.

At Jack's slight nod, the person continued, "Hey, I'm Brian Kilpa. I live next door to you, and we go to the same school."

This surprised Jack, as he had never seen this person anywhere outside of school, let alone moving around in the backyard of the next door neighbours. He adopted a look that basically said 'And the reason for your coming over at 2 AM is...?' to Brian, which caused the other teen to blush slightly and giggle nervously.

"Well, the thing is, we moved in just a couple weeks ago, and I had intended to come straight over and meet you, but my parents told me that they'd heard from your parents that something bad had happened just before we moved. And, I've kinda watched you for the last couple of nights, and I've noticed you tossing and turning a lot in your sleep, so I thought I'd come over and see if you wanted to talk about it." Brian said in a rush.

As Jack began to shake his head, backing away and looking like the proverbial deer, Brian started to look a little worried. "You don't have to if you don't want to; I just thought you might want a friendly ear to listen. I didn't mean to upset you." He said, as he started to slowly back up to the window, before turning to climb back out and head home. It was a gentle hand grabbing his forearm that put a halt to his escape. He turned to see Jack standing there, tears running down his cheeks, leaving silver tracks where they did so.

In a voice rough from disuse, Jack spoke for the first time in two weeks. "Please don't leave. I wasn't expecting anyone to actually want to listen to what I have to say, without needing to see a head shrink."

"Why would they expect you to see a shrink?" Brian asked out of sheer curiosity. "'Cause it's my fault that Lee died." Jack whimpered.

"Who's Lee?" Brian asked.

"He was my b.... er, friend." Jack said. Brian had, however, heard the slip, but decided not to push the issue.

"And he died?" At Jack's nod, he continued. "So how was it your fault? You didn't shoot him or something did you?"

"No, he died on one of our rides to the park in town, and it was only because I wanted to that we were riding where we were." Jack said, fresh tears falling down his cheeks.

"Well, did you often go on rides to the park?" Brian asked, to which Jack nodded. "So, it's not like it was really your fault. It was something that you had no control over."

"But I... told him something and he was distracted." Jack said.

"I'm sure it wasn't that bad." Brian said.

"He was so distracted... he didn't even get a chance to move out of the way of the semi that was going past us." Jack finished quietly.

"Semi? Wait a minute, I read something about that accident. Wasn't the driver drunk and doing like 80 in the 50 zone?" Brian asked.

"What?" Jack asked.

"The driver of that semi blew like .17 and he was speeding through the area. Don't you see? While what you said may have distracted him, if the driver hadn't been drunk or speeding, Lee would probably still be alive today." Brian said in a voice that pleaded for Jack to understand.

"Wow, I never thought of it that way." Jack said, confused by the sudden epiphany he now faced.

"You see now. As much as it hurts you to think, perhaps Lee wasn't meant to be in this plane after this accident. Perhaps his death was a bad thing that had to happen for something good to happen for you." Brian said.

"But I can't think of anything good that's happened from this." Jack said sadly. "Well... you met me." Brian said uncertainly.

"Yeah... hey, yeah! And now I owe you one midnight visit, complete with window tapping." Jack perked up.

"Well, I wouldn't take it that far. Unlike some, I need my full 8 hours of sleep to look my best." Brian teased.

"So tomorrow you're gonna look like shit? And what makes you think this is my everyday look?" Jack asked.

"Yeah, I'll probably look like complete shit, but I happen to think it's completely worth it to have met you properly. Besides, I happen to think that you still look good... despite the whole 'death warmed up' thing you've got going on." Brian smiled.

"Well, I think it'd be best if I was to try and get some sleep... but, um..." Jack started. "'Um' what?" Brian asked.

"Could... could you... stay with me? It's just... every time I close my eyes, I'm plagued by nightmares of the whole accident." Jack finished meekly.

"I... guess I can. I don't think my 'rents'll care after I tell 'em why." Brian said. In his mind,

he was hoping he wouldn't inadvertently do anything to give away his secret.

"Cool. Well, I have a queen size bed, so I hope you don't mind sharing too much." Jack said, happy to have someone there with him in case of nightmares.

"That's fine. I'm used to sharing a bed with my best friend back at my old town." Brian said.

As the boys prepared for bed, Jack's thoughts turned to his recent turn of luck. After Lee has died, he felt as though life wasn't meant for him, and he was even planning to take his life, probably on New Year's Eve, when his parents were likely to be at a friend's house for a party. Now, he could see light at the end of the dark tunnel he was walking, in the form of Brian. Brian, who had put himself out there, risked looking like an idiot, just to meet the mysterious boy next door, that everyone said was depressed.

Brian's thoughts were on math, simply to stop himself from developing a problem 'down south'. From what he could see of Jack, he could tell that when he cared for himself properly, the boy would be a real hottie.

As Jack moved to turn the light off, Brian climbed onto the bed, getting himself comfortable. When Jack returned, he climbed on next to Brian, lying on his side facing the other teen.

"I need to thank you for tonight," he said, "if you hadn't come over tonight, I'd have been unable to sleep... and... I was actually going to kill myself soon. Now though, I think I have a pretty good reason to live. If I can spend a lot of time with you, I think I'll be fine."

"Then I'm glad I came over when I did. I'd hate to have to live through life wondering of my visit could have prevented you from killing yourself and now I know it would have, or should I say it has." Brian responded with a smile.

Soon, both boys drifted off into a peaceful night's sleep. One slept without the usual torment of the night, and the other slept with his first friend in this strange place.

The next morning, both boys were awoken by the sounds of a group of adults talking down the hall from Jack's room. The first thing both noticed, was the fact that during the night, they had ended up snuggled together face-to-face, despite the heat. Their faces were only centimetres apart. Both faces flushed with heat at the closeness of each other.

"Um... hey." Jack said nervously.

"Hey." Brian replied in a whisper. "Sounds like my parents are here and talking to yours."

"Sounds that way. Um... do you know how we ended up so close last night?" Jack asked shyly.

"I think you ended up pulling me into you when you began having a nightmare and then you settled right down again." Brian replied, his blush deepening.

"Oh... okay." Jack replied.

Brian lay there, staring into eyes that were a chocolate brown that bordered on black, filled with what appeared to be specks of gold. As he stared, he unconsciously moved his face closer to Jack's, before pausing, his lips just a centimetre from Jack's. It was Jack that moved forward, capturing Brian's lips in a slow kiss. The world around both boys disappeared, as Jack moved to deepen the kiss. It was five minutes before the pair of them returned to Earth, awe-filled faces beaming at each other.

"Wow." Was all that Jack was able to say.

"Yeah... that was great. I'd like to do that with you a lot." Brian said in a dreamy voice. "Well, I think I'd also like that." Jack said.

"Boys?! You need to get up now, or you'll miss breakfast!" Jack's mum shouted up the stairs.

"Okay, mum!" Jack replied.

"Well, time to face the music." Brian said, getting off the bed. "I don't think it'll be all that bad." Jack said.

When the boys made their way downstairs, they found Jack's mum collapsed on the couch in the lounge room, tears streaming down her cheeks, Jack's dad and Brian's parents surrounding her.

"Um... mum? What's wrong?" Jack asked uncertainly, which resulted in his mum jumping up from the couch and throwing her arms around him.

"Oh my baby boy. It's so good to hear your voice again. You have no idea how sad I was when you had stopped talking. And you," she continued, pulling Brian into a tight hug, "it's obvious that your late night visit, and yes, I did know about that, has done something no one else has been able to do for weeks. You've brought my son back to me, and for that, I'm forever indebted to you."

"It was nothing... really." Brian replied, his face turning a deep red.

"Nonsense, you have also made my biggest Christmas wish this year come true. Now, we all know that the two of you are probably now an item, and I for one, am very happy with my son's choice in men." Jack's mum said, causing both boys' mouths to drop open in shock. "Oh, don't look so surprised, either of you."

"Brian," Brian's mum started, "your father and I have known for some time that you would eventually find love with another boy, and we're okay with your choice in boys."

Both boys were so shocked by the revelations that it took them 5 minutes to be able to speak again.

Soon, everyone in the house was enjoying their first Christmas lunch together, before sitting down and sharing presents with each other, Brian giving Jack one final surprise of an engraved bracelet.

FIN...